There i was, running as if i were as light as a feather. Running, without caring what was in my way. I just kept running. I didn't even know he was calling out my name. I didn't realize that tears were flowing down my cheek, like an endless river. I reached the front gate of the school, wanting to cross the road but i forgot to check for oncoming vehicles.
*wheels of a car screeching*
I felt a sharp pain in my spine. I just saw myself under a vehicle. I think i got hit. I don't know. The pain is slowly fading. I don't feel anything anymore. I saw an image of a person above me. I feel a little damp on my clothes and i heard a distant sound of someone screaming. I don't know. It was all a blur.
I saw myself lying there, in a pool of blood. And there he stood, sitting beside my bloody body, crying. I was dead.
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"I hope he's okay. He broke both his arm and leg in the accident. Double Whammy!" says Ashley.
"Yeah, he's a really good guy you know. I hope he's alright," replies Britney.
I just stood there as the conversation continues. I, Megan Michael, is in love with him. He is the person i have been crushing for since the moment i entered high school and now i am a senior, graduating very soon. Too soon. And I, as the pathetic girl I am, have yet to confess to the guy i have been drooling for since 3 years ago.
Me and him, we don't talk much. We just chatted online and just have a quick "Hi" every now and then. But we never had a real conversation. Even the conversations online stops with an awkward pause. He texts me every now and then, but usually when i see the text's, it is usually those annoying chain letter texts which gets on your nerves but i still send them anyway, because it was from him and i don't want to "hurt" his feelings. Pathetic isn't it? I know he doesn't see me as a girl but as a friend he talks to occasionally.
Yeah, he broke his leg a few days ago. When i saw him on a wheelchair and being taken home by his dad, i was shocked, i froze the moment i saw him in that state. The moment i arrived home, i made a Get Well Soon card which i know will never be given to him, because we hardly bump into each other. This is just stupid. Why did i make the card? I already know i wouldn't have the chance to give it to him. But, why am i still making it? I should just throw everything into the trash bin but why am I still making it?
He finally came to school after 1 week recovering at home. In my mind, were scenarios i created before going to bed, of me meeting him. They kept on replaying. Why wouldn't my mind stop? Why wouldn't i just forget about him? Why can't my mind stop flashing the image of his face during class? It is really distracting.
After the images stop, the little moments of him laughing in a distance comes on. His warm, charming smile, melts me every time. If only his smile only belongs to me. How great that will be.
The days of the week pass by slowly. Finally, Friday has come. The day where he would have band practice and i could watch but, as always, at a distance. I will silently watch him. Silently laugh from his silly antics. My eyes glued to him. When he looks around, for some reason, i would hide. I don't want him to think of me as a stalker. That would ruin the relationship that we already had. But why would i care? He doesn't see me as a "best friend". There is no point worrying right? Yet, i still watch him silently and hide when he turns around.
After band practice, usually, he would walk around to kill some time as he goes home late. I finally found the opportunity to give him the belated "get well soon" card. After i am done with that procedure, i will try my best to forget every single detail of him. His smile, the way he laughs, the way he walks, the way he is nice to everybody,they way he never leaves anyone out of the loop, everyone except me.
There he is, standing there with his back pack hanging on one shoulder and eyes glued to his cell phone. I gathered up all of the courage that i have and take a step forward. With the card in my hand, i took another step forward. One after another. I took slow steps until i was close enough to him to give him the card and leave. Then, it will all be over. Over for good.
"Erm, hi."
"Hi! It's been a while since i saw you. How have you been?"
"Err... I've been okay."
"Hey, what do you have there? Can i see it?"
"Uh, actually, its for you."
"Me? Why, you shouldn't have."
"Here. "
On the card read: Although you already got better, just take it alright? :) Get well soon and be your usual cheerful self. :) I think you need a big hug:) All Smiles :D From Annonymouse. Just kidding, It's Megan. :)
"Cute card! But you shouldn't have. Hey what's wrong?"
I kept my head low, eyes pinned to the ground. I just didn't want him to see me like this.
"Are you crying? Don't cry."
Then, at that moment, he hugged me. I didn't know what to do. My crush of 3 years is hugging me right now. In the hallway, with the lockers, the trophy casses, and just the both of us. My tears started flowing out.
"I think you need the hug more than i do. So, cherish it okay? Don't cry."
"I have something to tell you." I said, while sobbing.
"I liked you since i entered high school. I know i am not a good enough girl for you. I know you prefer those pretty, popular cheerleader girls than me, any day. You don't have to worry about me. Just ignore it. You can throw the card if you want to. Just forget about me." I blabbered.
I then ran through the hallway, with tears in my eyes, and all the thoughts of him came rushing through my mind. I really like him. No, I really LOVE him. Bu i know he doesn't love me back. There is no possible way he would like me. There is no way.
I pushed open the doors of the hallway and ran through the school compound. I didn't know he was chasing me. I was in my own world. I just want to run away. Run away from this terrible, unfair world but it still seems like heaven enough for me. I ran across the road. I didn't know what was coming. An that marks the end of me. At least i confessed the the guy i like. After 3 long years.
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